Sarah Ferguson...snake-oil saleswoman Oprah Winfrey manipulates Duchess!

On the heels of crying the blues - and hitting the high-energy talk-show circuit to plug her spanking-new "docu-series" (Finding Sarah) - the latest chapter of Sarah Ferguson's sorry saga spewed out over the broadcast airwaves to titillate the country once again this past week.

Has the woman no shame?

Well, if 'ya ask me, Oprah Winfrey - who made a gracious exit from network television last week - is largely to blame for the tawdry fiasco!

In fact, once the "Sarah and Oprah" interview aired yesterday - to launch the much-ballyhooed "tell-all" - it was quite evident to me that Big "O" is nothing more than a clever snake-oil-saleswoman out to rustle up controversy, boost ratings, and selfishly tout her dubious bill-of-fare at the OWN network.

For example, when Sarah Ferguson was caught red-handed influence-peddling last year in an undercover sting, the cast-out Royal fessed up that she fell victim to the temptation because - she was not only "broke" - but had also hit rock-bottom emotionally.

At this juncture, Oprah - who claimed to be a "good friend" - entered into discussions with Sarah about the development of a vehicle aimed at rehabilitating Ferguson's image in the public eye on the OWN Network.

"Why not a series on cooking," Sarah allegedly suggested to her pal, as she struggled to swallow her pride in a desperate hour of need.

Personally, I believe that the idea for the culinary show was an excellent way to go, for a couple of reasons.

For starters, it would have brought much-needed funds into the coffers - and thus - provided the wherewithal for the former Duchess of York to support herself and her children.

In addition, the cooking spot would have slowly restored Sarah's flaky image to the public-at-large around this country and across the big pond.

Mission: Accomplished!

But, for some inexplicable reason, Oprah elected to offer up a show that would "toss a spotlight" on Sarah's lack of good judgment and fall from Grace in the past.

More scurrilous, perhaps, was Oprah's deceitful decision to draw on the professional assistance of two network personalities (Dr. Phil, for one) she has been vigorously promoting - in what amounts to - a "spotty" television schedule (full of holes).

Oprah's conduct was (and is) particularly outrageous when you consider one obvious fact.

Near the end of the interview, after playing back tapes of the upcoming segments of "Finding Sarah", Oprah actually concludes to Sarah (and her viewing audience) that Prince Andrew's former spouse essentially got into trouble because she was too vulnerable and too trusting.

"So, people were able to take advantage of you," Oprah summarized in so many words.

Ironic, that!

In the final analysis, Oprah Winfrey was guilty of the same cruel and unusual outrageous conduct.

If Oprah really cared about Sarah (some friend!) she would have signed on the flaming red-headed beauty for a cooking show.

Instead, she elected to manipulate Ms. Ferguson into a reality-based docu-series about a tawdry scandal from the past, in order to boost her ratings, and also promote Dr. Phil (and a money guru she's also pushing) on her fledgling network.

In sum, Oprah is just another shark, circling the treacherous waters for innocent prey.

Does Big "O" think we were all born yesterday?

Talk about disreputable conduct!

Shame on you, Oprah.

"Finding Sarah" broadcasts on June 12th (2011).

You be the judge!

http://www.thetattler.biz





Fairy Tale crumbled under glare of spotlight!

Royal Wedding...Dress Rehearsal for Prince William & Kate! Fancy fruit cake, please!

 

They say:

“Life is not a dress rehearsal.”

However, there are specific occasions when dazzling overwhelming high-profile events require them.

So, that is why there was a big turn-out across the big pond in London yesterday, two days before the Royal Wedding of this - or any century for that matter - revs up!

In anticipation of the much-ballyhooed union of two star-crossed lovers – starring Prince William and Kate Middleton front-row-and center at Westminster Abbey – Queen E2 and her handlers (and a large contingent of Windsors and Middletons) purred around the bustling downtown streets in luxury limos (to essentially trot the gauntlet along the route of the wedding motorcade) to ensure that the Royals get it "just right" tomorrow when the future King of England ties-the-knot with his pretty love (kiss-me-Kate).

Abba, Elton John and his boy-toy - and a posse of others - will have to get to the church in their own sweet time without much help from Officials at Buckingham Palace on the other hand.

Meanwhile - Tony Blair, President Obama, and the Duchess of Pork – um - York - need not fight the crush of traffic since the trio of high-profile personalities won't be attending.

Uh-huh!

All snubbed.

Will there be any missed cues or late entrances?

While the blushing bride is expected to utter up - "I Do" - don't expect Kate to gush that she'll "obey".

According to insider scuttlebutt, the future Princess exercised her right to editorial control, alright.

On the sidelines, Dave Letterman and Jay Leno are expected to toss a jibe or two on their highly-rated talk shows Friday night, in the aftermath of the media bonanza.

Especially when it comes to the official wedding cake.

Although the spokesperson for the Royals took great pains to characterize the frothy-looking multi-tiered cake as a rich delicious treat waiting to be served up with a lot of "wow" factor at the chi-chi after-party, the truth of the matter?

The crown jewel of pastries is basically a fruit cake, all tarted up, nothing more nothing less!

However, for the kiddies (the younger hipper set with a sweet tooth or two not inclined to hanker to tradition, gee whiz), there will be a tasty chocolate crisp yummy sure to go down smoothly with a dash of milk, chilled bubbly, even a brewskie!

At press time, roving reporters were still hovering the crowded terrain at a fever pitch, still anxious to get first dibbs on a publicity still sure to nab millions!

A shot of Kate's designer frock to be worn to Westminster Abbey for the ultra-tony social event of the year would be a mighty coup for any self-respecting paparazzi worth his weight to snap up.

Bet your sweet bippy, that even if the pricey gown doesn't make an entrance early on the world stage - that within minutes of the breathtaking reveal - trendy rip-off designers in the rag-trade will be rustling up cheap knock-offs to flog to commoners anxious to don for their own romantic day of wedded (eternal?) bliss.

News at 11!

http://www.thetattler.biz

Can Wills & Kate top Lady Diana's Royal Wedding?

Royal Wedding...1900 elite guests await plain wrapper invite! Prince Harry to rehab?

Royal Couple prepares for wedded bliss!

The latest word out of Buckingham Palace is that invites to the much-anticipated Royal Wedding (die-stamped in gold and decorated with gilded edges) - undoubtedly the fairytale social event of the year - have been discreetly mailed out in pale brown envelopes by regular post.

According to insiders (who choose to remain anonymous for fear of being cast out) 1900 guests - in good standing with the Queen and the fresh-faced young couple - have been given the nod to attend the prestigious Wedding Ceremony at Westminster Abbey on April 29th.

Apparently, Fergie - the Duchess of Pork (er- York) - has not been invited (contrary to previous up-to-the-minute news flashes fired off by frenzied media types hungry for gossipy tid-bits on U.S. shores).

To official Royal observers keeping track of the slights on the sidelines - the end scenario for the scandal-ridden former better-half of randy Prince Andrew - comes as no surprise.

"Would you invite an ex-wife to a wedding," one crusty old cynic snidely joked in response to urgent press queries in recent days.

Some of the elite few expected to attend (friends of the Prince, his bride, and her family) include members of the military (a handful of Will's colleagues from the Royal Air Force, for instance), obedient foreign diplomats, European-born Royals (in-laws, for starters), and welcome down-to-earth folks who have toiled faithfully for a handful of worthy charities that the Royals support.

Inquiring minds want to know if Elton John - once a close confidant of Lady Diana - will be granted the rite of passage.

Kanye West (who performed at a 2007 tribute for Prince William's mother) may be a shoe-in, though.

After all, Prince William has been pining for a dazzling hip crowd to be in tow - or so say - my sources.

Are the back-biting cads to be believed?

No doubt - QE 2 - will have the final say.

By the way, the grand old Dame will be tossing a luncheon for 600 hand-picked guests, at Buckingham Palace.

No to be outdone, Prince Charles has elected to also spring for a chi-chi soiree, at which 300 are expected to toast handsome Prince William and his pretty young bride.

By then, the dust probably should have settled on Prince Harry's "wild stag",  I expect.

In view of his dishevelled appearance in the wee hours of dawn just a scant few days ago, can rehab be far behind?

News at 11!

http://www.thetattler.biz




Royals stripped bare in glare of spotlight!

Sarah Ferguson...demands $750,000.00 for access to Prince Andrew! Caught on video...

The scandal-mongers are having a field day across the pond!

Word out of England is that the Duchess of York was captured on-camera a scant six hours ago negotiating a deal for access to her former husband - Prince Andrew (father of her children) - for the staggereing sum of $500,000.00.

Sarah Palin has nothing on this greedy Royal!

Embarrassing footage reveals Sarah Ferguson perched in a plush armchair sealing the pact - and get this - facilitating a crude hand gesture to signal the bag man to hand over  the cash.

As it turns out, the gentleman who met with Fergie, was an undercover reporter (keen on exposes) from News of the World.

An insider at the Palace shook her head.

"Sarah should have been more cautious."

In a prepared statement, the Duchess noted for the record that Prince Andrew was not invovled.

Ms. Ferguson went on to apologize profusely and acknowledged that engaging in that kind of conduct was an error in judgment.

No word from the Royals at press time.

http://www.thetattler.biz/

FOOTNOTE

The sum requested by Fergie was 500,000.00  pounds sterling.

The $750,000.00 referred in the caption represents U.S. Funds

Young Victoria ...Duchess of York & writer Julian Fellowes wow rapt filmgoers @ screening! Exquisite 4 star screen bio captivates...

A buzz circulated around the theatre on the heels of a rumor - that the Duchess of York was slated to attend the Q & A - once the credits rolled at the end of the screening of  "Young Victoria".

A few naysayers were adamant that it certainly could not be so!

"I didn't see any security," one snotty bottle-blond huffed in a seat behind me.

"I don't think so."

Party pooper!

After all, I had it on good authority (the usher confirmed it!) that the flaming red-haired freckled-beauty, was expected to trot out to bask in the glow a tad.

But, for those unfamiliar with the production notes, the notion was obviously an absurd one.

Truth of the matter is - Sarah Ferguson  (formerly the Duchess of Pork - um - York) - hatched the idea for the big-screen biopic which focuses solely on the early days of Queen Victoria's reign (and her subsequent proposal of marriage to handsome cousin Albert from across the English Channel).

"We're all familiar with the image of the elderly Victoria in her black mourning clothes," Fergie (dare I refer to the former Royal so casually in passing?) noted somewhat poignantly to the rapt filmgoers hanging on every succinct (effervescent) word.

One day - as Ferguson was hunkered down in the very quarters at Buckingham Palace where Victoria wiled away many an hour away from her subjects - it hit her like a bolt of lightning.

A film about Victoria's youth might just change the dreary grey image forevermore.

So - a treatment was lovingly pieced together as a sort-of tribute to the celebrated Monarch - who still holds the prestigious honor of being the longest-reigning Queen in England's history.

Eventually, the project ended up in the lap of Julian Fellowes, which ended up being an auspicious turning-point for the mother of two skirting the outer fringes of Tinseltown in a breathy-search for backers.

When an interviewer from the LA TIMES (on behalf of the "Envelope" series currently in full swing) probed a bit about the integrity of the material, Ms. Ferguson didn't hesitate to point a finger at one producer who intended to sensationalize the material (to the Royal Family's detriment).

"He was going to shoot a scene of Victoria in bed with one of the Lords," she lamented, to all within earshot.

That's show biz, ducky!

Altough the germ of the idea sprang from Ferguson's own creative vision - and painstaking research on the Queen Victoria (and the Royals in general)  - she downplayed her role in a humorous fashion last night.

"I was just a chick in the henhouse," she giggled, as her earthy-side (which often got her knickers caught in a twist with the Queen Mom) surfaced a smidgen out-of-control and reared its gutsy head.

There was an awkward silence for a sec - at which point - it dawned on Ferguson that perhaps she misspoke.

"Well, maybe a wolf in the henhouse."

Indeed, the sometimes-author of children's books, had no qualms admitting it was tenacity - and bit of the old spit-and-shove - that got the production into high gear eventually.

In fact, the Queen's cast-off daughter-in-law (black sheep of the family, dudes!)  was such a formidable public relations spokesperson for the project that it tended to force hands.

For example, when Ferguson was invited to attend the screeing of  DEPARTED, a soon as Julian Fellowes spied her strident approach in his direction, he stopped her dead in her tracks from afar.

"Yes, Fergie. We're going to shoot that picture," he hollered across the crowded causeway.

The sets and costumes are lush - exquisite - in fact; surprising, when you consider that there were budget constraints.

"How did you land those locations," the interviewer quizzed the Duchess excitedly.

"Did you have to ask the Queen for permission?"

"Well, yes. Usually, that is required," she chided tongue-in-cheek.

"When I got divorced from the Queen's handsomest son, I did the right thing and remained friends. After all, I really admire her (Elizabeth II).  Also, she is the grandmother of my children," she noted in so many words.

Almost in an aside, the spunky spirited dish, noted (somewhat reluctantly) that several of the fabulous castles and country estates the production team facilitated for the shoot were owned personally by a handful of her friends.

As the Divine Diva - Bettle Midler - would warble:

"You've got to have friends."

On that note, it should be pointed out that Fergie remains friends with her ex-husband (Prince Andrew).

As to "Young Victoria", well, I was so entralled (and caught up in every mesmerizing moment) that I lost track of all time in the plush theatre environs last evening. 

In fact, when it was apparent the film was winding down, I was taken aback.

Indignant!

What - it's over - so soon?

For many, this will be one of those rare screen adventures,  filmgoers would prefer to never end.

The acting, for starters, was simply superb.

And, all the elements sure to guarantee a blockbuster success, were up there on the silver screen, too: witty, fast-paced dialogue, touches of high drama interspered with side-splitting humorous interludes, gorgeous sweeping vistas of turn-of-the century England, a fascinating storyline filled with wonder and intrigue, and - above all - and a delicious love story sure to break out the soft kleenex and bon bons from the get-go.

4 Stars!

Congrats, Duchie.

http://www.julianayrs.com

Hillary Clinton...supporters lambast press for slighting her a**!

Artist notes full figure of Hillary too costly to sculpt...

Some times the morning paper is such a hoot.

Like today, for instance.

In an article on the presidential candidates, a journalist reported that Hillary Clinton supporters were irate with the press for casting their presidential hopeful in a bad light.

A couple of 'em whined that the media deliberately used unflattering camera angles to skewer her image. But, worse than that - were guilty of aiming the lens at her bu**cakes - whenever she bent over.

"It's derogatory," one fan fumed.

Well, the target is difficult to miss!

But, I have a suggestion as to how "Hill" can kill two birds with one stone.

Bill's other best-half, should sign on as a spokesperson for a diet product, much like the - "Duchess of York" - did.

In addition to slimming down and improving her image, she'd be able to rustle up some big bucks to breathe life into her sagging - um - campaign.

In the alternative, she could start flouncing about in a muumuu.

After all - to some - the cow is still sacred 'ya know!