Last night in Tinseltown, Ryan Seacrest nabbed the prestigious, honorary "It's all about me" award at the annual Emmy blow-out in Hollywood.
It was a close call for Seacrest.
Originally, it didn't look like he'd land the ubiquitous gig, as he trotted nose to nose alongside another dark horse to the finishing line for the honors.
Seacrest eventually pulled through, then promptly ordered up a top-of-the-line penguin suit, to adorn his precious bod at the Industry's glitzy tribute to excellence in Television.
The American Idol (in his own mind, anyway) kibitzed with the best of 'em on a plush, red-carpet - in a teaser-style pre-show - for nigh on four hours!
Yeah, he commingled, and gabbed - canoodled, too - the whole nine yards.
So much so, that when the curtain was raised for the prime time event, the quirky TV Celeb had a problem ejaculating - er - delivering the goods he'd been hired for!
A guest in the wings overheard Seacrest utter, "Je suis fatigue", as he flopped into an over-sized, stuffed armchair backstage.
Of course, as french linguists know, this translates to, "I'm tired".
Yeah, that was the general consensus.
There's an old Hollywood saying, "if they're staring at your feet, instead of your exquisite face, you're in trouble."
As if to beg the question, Seacrest embarked on a surreal kind of foot fetish - yes, he had the audacity to fawn over Eva Longoria's designer shoes!
Ho, hum!
Network Execs at Fox would be wise to slip Seacrest a pair of spanking-new ruby-red-slippers, then banish him to Kansas, huh Dorothy?
A banter with "Boston Legal’s" William Shatner didn't fare much better; as one caustic industry-insider noted - "not comedy gold" - either.
Mr. Seacrest, you've got a great face for radio! (hint hint)
The "It's all about me" statuette is awarded to the Host most dedicated to shameless self-promotion, who is quite generally devoid of any self-awareness, and more profoundly, lacking in any innate ability to shut the old pie hole when called for.
And of course, there must be an over-riding gift for mindless gab - usually wrapped fastidiously in 8-10 glossies of themselves.
Heh, contrats Ryan!
Very deserving...
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