The Bachelor...pops question with dazzling bling! Drama tears at heart-strings!







Critics were wrong?

Whew!

That was quite a dazzling sparkler that Brad Womack selected for the woman of his dreams last night on the hit night-time reality show "The Bachelor".

Uh-huh!

Gosh, I got tired of waiting for Prince Charming to surprise me with some bling, so I went out bought my own.

Thank you very much!

But, when push came to shove (poor choice of words?), the handsome stud was on bended-knee, because he was definitely in the market for a bride.

Judging by the emotional drama that went down last night, it was quite evident that the Austin resident elected to go with his heart!

For a moment, it appeared that he was going to have cold feet, though.

For example, when his first choice (a blond beauty his family was obviously pulling for) read him the riot act about the responsibilities of fatherhood that lay ahead, Womack appeared to have doubts.

The drama heightened when Emily Maynard kicked herself for screwing up.

In her mind's eye, the sexy wannabe bride, felt she may have scared the suitor off.

"I always get insecure and it spoils everything," she wailed in so many words in the aftermath of one tense emotional moment.

But, love prevailed, and there was a fairy-tale Hollywood ending.

For one of the contestants, at least.

Poor Chantall (the woman who shocked the country in the season opener when she slapped Womack

"I feel so foolish," she sniffed, as the limo whisked her away, to be banished for evermore.

Brad handled the situation pretty well, though.

After noting that he was truthful about how he felt about her (which led her to believe she might have been the "one"), he softened the blow of rejection by uttering up a reality that may have been difficult to swallow nonetheless.

"My feelings are someone else were stronger," he fessed up.

A gentleman to the end, alright.

Meanwhile, congrats are in order for Brad and Emily, alright!

http://www.thetattler.biz/

Kate Gosselin...media monster about to bust out! Billy Bush watch your back...

Has Kate Gosselin gobbled up her fifteen minutes of fame?

Or, is the madcap mom just over-exposed?

Tonight, the 'Dancing with Stars" contestant was all sweetness and light and all over the airwaves.

Imagine that, Kate segued into co-hosting with Mary Hart on Entertainment Tonight.

Next to the seasoned pro, Kate came off a bit timid, and in need of some vocal projection.

Although Hart didn’t appear to be have her feathers ruffled by this novel upstart, it appeared to be a different scenario over on the set of Access Hollywood with Billy Bush.

Was it my imagination, or was Kate taking a dim view of the Bush bravado and his in-your-face cocky man-style?

When he asked her what she was laughing at in one curious moment, she held back.

But, like me, viewers at home must have perceived that Kate didn’t find much favor with the Bush persona.

Bad “office” politics, Kate!

Oh well, blame it on emotional exhaustion.

The clunky two-stepper has been pushed and probed about dating, has worried over custody battles, you name it.

All of her responses appear to be calculated promotional “burps” designed to manipulate interviewers and rustle up a squeaky-clean image sure to warm the hearts and minds (and sympathy) of  viewers around the country.

I pity John!

Oh, she’s a monster alright, but most are in the dark about that right now.

Wake up and smell the coffee, America!

http://www.thetattler.biz

Casey Johnson...death due to natural causes! Diabetes complications...

Although there was a lot of wild speculation and gossip raging in the wake of the sudden mysterious demise of heiress Casey Johnson, the city Coroner has determined that the media celebrity actually died of diabetes complications.

A preliminary investigation by the LAPD previously found nothing to infer that Ms. Johnson - heir to the Johnson & Johnson fortune - died of anything but natural causes.

In recent months, Johnson - a stunning beauty often caught up in the glare of the spotlight - gained some notoriety by virtue of a lesbian relationship with TV Reality star, Tia Tequila.

Johnson passed away on January 4th, and was the daughter of the New York Jets owner, Woody Johnson.

Hilton girls packed up Casey's personal effects

Heiress & Reality TV star Tia Tequila

Tony Danza...those who can't do Television on prime-time...teach!

Tony Danza - under the A-list radar in Tinsel town lately - is all gung-ho about trotting into the reality TV arena.

If it's good enough for John & Kate - or Octamom - then Danza is all-primed-up and ready to bounce a bit on the slippery ropes to give it a sleazy whirl.

The boxer-cum-dancer (not a bad two-stepper) has been offered the role of a 10th-grade English teacher in a reality show titled "Teach".

When I was a student, studly Prof pickings, were slim to none.

"Teach", well, it's pure fantasy!

Now class, remember - "i" before "e" except after "c" - got it kiddies?

The likable, once studly actor - who appeared regularly on hit sitcoms such as "Taxi" - appears to be taking a bumpy slow-ride to obscurity.

Talk about reality!

Does the street-wise (former boxer) have the chutzpah to pull it off if he gets a crack at it?

If not, there's always Dinner Theatre, Tony!

http://www.julianayrs.com

Joan Rivers...in my face at Zimbio! Shucks, give the tropper a plug...

When Joan Rivers appears for an interview and issues a polite request to the hosts - like, what's off-limits on air, for starters - the comedy-circuit trooper means business, dudes!

Just ask those bozos in Sacramento last week who ignored her wishes and stepped over the line!

In the sleepy state Capitol to plug her latest foray into the unconventional realm of zany off-beat comedy in the reality-TV vein, Joan specifically pooh-poohed any notion that her lovely daughter Melissa would be mindless fodder on the airwaves as she ruefully played foil on the local broadcast.

Lights! Camera! Action!

Within seconds, the dim-witted hosts were plying her with a question about you-know-who.

A silly prank?

Not to Joan!

The funny-lady packed up her back of tricks, then walked!

Ouch!

In contrast, I have a fond memory of rubbing shoulders with Rivers.

Several years ago, a casting director hired me to play a bit part on a comedy special that Joan was producing for a cable network:

"A Salute to Heidi Abromowitz"

Yeah, I'm dating myself.

Die-hard fans of the witty legend will recall that in the heyday of her dizzying climb to the top of the topsy-turvy comedy ladder, Heidi was a character Joan often whimsically featured in her stints on stage and spiced up dialogue with on popular talk shows around the country.

In the spot I was hired to act in (which ended up being a few meager seconds on-camera) I was directed to don a Fireman's Uniform and straddle the hood of a spanking-new candy-apple-red Mercedes Benz as it cruised up the street in tony Beverly Hills.

Yup.

The wicked sight gag was a jab at the excesses of wealthy.

Now, Rivers is taking on the rich with a whole new perspective!

How do I know?

Each day as I log onto my blog, I come face-to-face with Joan's mug, at the celebrity website.

The long and short of it?

Her comedy entry (due to premiere this week on August 5th) is one of Zimbio's sponsors.

And, I confess, the eye-catching video clip promoting the show (firmly ensconced above my publicity still & resume) did the trick.

Within seconds, my curiousity was piqued - at which point - I was summarly dragged into Joan's hilarious (at times naughty) brand of humor.

It's easy to figure out in a heartbeat.

"How did you get rich" hinges on the iffy-premise that there are a posse of ultra-rich folks out there - self-made millionaires - with a tale to tell.

Where, Joan, where?

In response to that million-dollar question - Joan's production team heads out each episode impromptu - and sets their lofty sights on the spoils of self-made millionaires - with the hope that down-on-their-luck Americans (who don't have enough moolah to stuff their own tagless mattresses with) will confidently strike out on their own with their novel ideas and potential money-making inventions.

After all, aren't consumers just waiting with bated breath for a truckload of little gadgets to be turned out on E-Bay, with the ultimate aim of lightening the load a tad?

Just betcha, Joan never thought for a lucky-lotto minute that folks around the Nation were actually scarfing up big wins with $5 scratch-offs, hitting elusive jackpots in Vegas, or even inheriting oodles of cash out-of-the-blue from long-lost relatives in Kalamazoo.

"They made their fortunes by inventing Billy Bob Teeth and Butt Paste," she dead-pans to the camera with a straight face.

And, bottom line, she intends to dig deep for the answers, too.

"It's amazing content," quipped producer Mark Burnett (Survivor).

On Rodeo Drive, for instance, Joan spies someone getting out of a Ferrari to have lunch (and without any qualms) strides right up and asks the startled local point-blank how he got rich, according to the giggling reality-show mogul.

She'll knock on a door in an upscale enclave and beg the question:

"How did you get so fu**ing rich?"

Heh, by the way, doesn't Joan look dishy these days?

Has she uncovered the fountain of youth, happened upon a wonder potion, or was it just a bit of tension-specific stretching this way 'n that (yoga, 'ya know?) that blessed the timeless comedy Goddess with that almost-surreal outer-glow?

Inquiring minds want to know, Joan!

Break a pretty gam, eh?

Memorable schtick with the late great Johnny Carson

http://www.julianayrs.com

Paris Hilton...casts for confidante, sensitivity a must!

Paparazzi wrangling required!





I stumbled across an interesting casting notice in Back Stage.



Paris Hilton, our darling media muffin, is seeking a confidante for her new reality show, My New BFF.



I suppose the first task would be to figure out what BFF stands for. I hang my head in shame and admit. I cheated.



I cruised over to her web site and was able to determine the initials stand for, "New Best Friend".



Ho hum!



Some of the scintillating ideas I conjured up in my own twisted mind were a lot more intriguing, I assure you!



But, moving on...



When it comes to potential candidates, Paris is fairly open across the board. For instance, the casting office notes that applicants may be male or female and any age or ethnicity.



I suppose if she hires a studly guy he could double as a bodyguard. Or, in the alternative, don a Chauffeur's cap when Missy gets a bit tipsy so the hostess-with-the-mostest may avoid another DUI.



But, be wary (dear Paris) of warming up to a pretty young gal. If you're not careful she'll be strutting around in your designer duds when you're at Mom's and trying to slip into the sack with your boyfriend when the two of you are on the outs.



Go for a homely woman with sensible shoes!



Apparently, Ms. Hilton's handlers have noted that endurance is essential.



If all that late-night carousing and jockeying for face time amid the swarms of blood-thirsty paparazzi staking out territory in front of the "Villa" and "Koi" invigorates 'ya, this is your cup of tea.



Of course, loyalty is important, too.



In that case, Paris, let's have a heart to heart. Time to dump that photographer who shot the publicity still posted above. Is it my imagination, or did the shutterbug cut off the top of your pretty noggin'? Or, are you just missing a vital part of your brain?



An ability to navigate "girl politics" is a prerequisite, as well.



Girl politics?



In that event, the hapless hopeful should take a cue from stumper Hillary Clinton. After all, the Dem Dame has been a sterling example of "humanization for maximum effect" in recent weeks.



Yes, it's important to be tear-eyed on occasion and reveal a vulnerable side. It drums up sympathy, after all. But, when called for, the right candidate should know how to stick to her guns and take a tough-as-nails stance to establish that no woman is a push-over, either.



In the event of a hissy-fit or two the confidante should be able to calm the waters by noting with soothing sensitivity,



"It's that time of the month, you know?"



Heck - didn't you know? - even guys have a day or two each month when they get - um - testy. Surely, Ms. Hilton is entitled to a bluesy off-note moment or two now 'n then!



So, good luck with the interviews, Ms. Hilton.



And, if any of the candidates don't work out, they can always shrug and say,



"Well, at least we had Paris."



Delectable culinary treats at Koi...





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