Immigration & Customs Enforcement...arrests fashion counterfeiters! San Francisco raids...

Vera Wang designs vulnerable to counterfeits!

Shortly after Bill Clinton walked daughter Chelsea down the aisle on his arm at her high-profile wedding over the weekend in Rhinebeck (NY), local news anchors reported on the stunning wedding gown designed by leading fashion designer, Vera Wang.

In follow-up newsbites, young brides-to-be were invited to stay tuned, to learn how they could "whip" up the same pricey "look" for their own special occasion at the altar to fall within their budget constraints.

You betcha!

Right now, in back-door shops around the country, a host of dress designers are probably tossing together wedding gowns that echo the exquisite gown worn by Chelsea at a fraction of the cost.

It's called a "knock-off - and the practice of copy-catting - is a prevelant trend in the highly-competitive fashion industry.

But, when a clothing manufacturer steals a design outright and stamps it with a designer's label (without permission or license) - of Vera Wang, for example - that is a fraudulent act which prompts Law Enforcement to sit up and take notice.

In fact, on Tuesday, prosecutors announced that they just conducted a sweep and have charged operators of eight boutiques in the Bay area, for allegedly turning out designer fakes which were actually cut-and-seamed together in China.

According to the US attorney for Northern California and U.S. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement (ICE), the twenty-five count indictment is part of the largest federal enforcement action ever taken against West Coast retailers suspected of selling counterfeit designer apparel and accessories.

And, the government takes these matters seriously for good reason.
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"Trademark infringement and intellectual property crime not only cost this country much needed jobs and business revenues, but the illegal importation of substandard products can also pose a serious threat to consumers' health and safety," an official noted in a terse press release on the heels of the arrests.

The accused knock-off artists were charged with conspiracy, smuggling goods into the U.S., and trafficking in counterfeit (fake) goods.

"To consumers who think designer knock-offs are a harmless way to beat the system and get a great deal, 'buyer beware','" said ICE Director John Morton.

"The investigation has led to the seizure of nearly 100 million dollars worth of counterfeit merchandise [based on the manufacturer's suggested retail price (MSRP) had the products been legitimate]," a statement said.

The luxury-brand fakes were packaged under known product names such as Prada, Louis Vuitton, Kate Spade, Nike, Armani, and Coach.

Tourists may have been hood-winked by the clever fakes that show up on retail shelves in the form of tony handbags, luxurious scarves, designer sunglasses, butter-smooth leather wallets, and snazzy eye-catching watches.

http://www.julilanaayrs.com

Chelsea Clinton Wedding...Wang was the thing!

Chelsea a Princess Bride in Vera Wang stunner!

No, mother did not wear tights, or a pant suit for that matter.

Instead, Hillary Rodam Clinton (U.S. Secetary of State) remained loyal and true to long-time pal - Oscar de la Renta - and made her grand entrance in an elegant wine-colored designer gown whipped up for the special occasion of her daughter's much-anticipated wedding.

As to Chelsea, well, right up until the 11th hour - the scintillating particulars - managed to remain shrouded in total secrecy.

What would you expect from the daughter of a former President?

Unfortunately for the Clinton's , a not-so-elusive Chelsea, got caught by ever-alert paparazzi slipping into Vera Wang's studio on the eve of the momentous occasion set to unfold in Rhinebeck (NY) on Sunday.

In two seconds flat, the tongues of uppercrust socialites were chattering, Wang is the thing!

Vanity Fair editors were miffed.

Sightings at Oscar's studio (de la Renta, silly!) had 'em firmly convinced that strong-willed Chelsea was going that-a-way for the crowning fairy-tale touch.

Women's Wear Daily got it right, though, after spying Chelsea at Wang's in a floppy chapeau that didn't quite manage to cover-up enough.

Ouch!

The floor-length gown subtly-imbedded with a smattering of jewel-like facets - and eye-catching shimmering waist-band fashion flourishes - surpassed all expectations of even the toughest discerning critic.

To many, the up-and-coming Wang - orbiting exclusively in her own exquisite fashion sphere - was a plum choice.

No surprise.

Since her brand was first introduced in 1990, the Wang persona - classical, full of whimsy, romantic - has become synonymous with wedding ensembles dripping with prestige, luxury, and hints of staggering social connections.

Tiers of white tulle bustled beneath a hand-stitched organza overlay in harmony with a gem-encrusted waist-band smacked of regal ambitions, for example.

And, a floor-length veil that draped (just so) over an elegant up-swept "do" - as the Princess Bride was escorted down the aisle by her father to the side of her husband-to-be - was truly the crowning touch.

Congrats Vera Wang, fashion Queen of the new millennium!

Clinton mobbed by well-wishers on eve of Chelsea's Wedding

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Chelsea Clinton... marries beau Marc! Pomp & circumstance prevailed in tony Rhinebeck (New York)...

Quaint Rhinebeck (NY) setting for Chelsea's tony wedding!

Snap of lovebirds day before nupitals!

Chelsea is  no longer a single working gal!

Just moments ago, Secretary of State - Hillary Clinton and hubby (former U.S. President Bill Clinton) - issued an upbeat notice to the presss acknowledging that their little girl - Chelsea - marched down the aisle on Saturday July 31st and tied the knot with her longtime boy-toy Marc Mezvinsky.

After weeks of secrecy (and a truckload of frenzied media attention) the two lovebirds finally exchanged their vows at an exclusive estate on the Hudson River - once owned by eccentric multi-millionaire - John Astor IV.

Uh-huh.

Chelsea wed straight-laced Marc Mezvinsky after weeks of secrecy and a build-up that had celebrity watchers flocking to the small village of Rhinebeck for the evening's nuptials.

"Today, we watched with great pride and overwhelming emotion as Chelsea and Marc wed in a beautiful ceremony at Astor Courts, surrounded by family and their close friends," the Clintons beamed.

More than 400 guests allegedly turned-out at the historic estate to catch the solemn exchange of vows  up-close and personal.

"We could not have asked for a more perfect day to celebrate the beginning of their life together, and we are so happy to welcome Marc into our family. On behalf of the newlyweds, we want to give special thanks to the people of Rhinebeck for welcoming us and to everyone for their well-wishes on this special day."

Security was tight, but that didn't stop lookie-loo's of the highest calibre, from trotting into town for a little star-gazing.

Today, a few disgruntled locals whined that the pickings were slim.

Ted Danson and Madeleine Albright were spied openly in the streets, yes, but that was not enough to satiate their hunger for a gander at a handful of the high-profile celebs that were expected to slip into town for what was being billed as the undisputed "Wedding of the Century".

"Where's Streisand," some wondered aloud to each other.

Probably having a quiet tete a tete over a bottle of Clinton Vintage Wine with slick Willy somewhere cozy and private on the 400 acre estate.

While we're on the subject of vino, one Rhinebeck neighbour was surprised to thrust open her front door at the crack-of-dawn today, and stumble upon a gift from the Clinton clan.

In a thoughtful note, the Clinton's apologized for any unexpected disturbances the wedding may have caused in the neighborhood in recent days, and proferred up a bottle of wine to help wile away what just may be a noisy night ahead.

Tucked inside was a pass, guaranteed to expedite their comings-and-goings 'round the quaint village, while security is tight over the next forty-eight hours or so.

Indeed.

Officials restricted airspace over the estate and the upscale enclave will remain a no-fly zone until 3:30 a.m. on Sunday (August 1st).

Roads were also blocked off,  so the gift bag to potentially inconvenienced neighbors, was sure to alleviate a headache or two.

The Beekman Arms, the oldest Hotel in the country, proved to be the best perch for star-gazers to alight last night with cameras and leather-bound autograph books in tow.

The cocktail party tossed there by the Clintons attracted - chic high-profile guests, family, and friends - who turned up in their Sunday-best to toss back an ale or two.

No sight of Chelsea throughout the course of the day, though.

Inside sources whispered in my ear that the anxious bride-to-be was taking in a swirl of spa treatments alongside her gaggle of giggling bridesmaids.

On the other hand, one black sheep of the family stood out like a sore thumb.

Roger Clinton - Bill's sibling rival - was caught on camera by one network newsie  shuffling down the main street with it all hanging out.

Unlike Hillary & Bill - who were blessed with lodging at the Amy Leibowitz estate - I expect that Jolly Roger was booked into the local Motel 6 (twenty miles down the main strip).

Chelsea Clinton and Marc Mezvinsky were teenage pals in Washington, before they both packed up their bags, and headed out West to enroll in prestigious Standford University where love - obviously - blossomed.

Although it was rumored that Chelsea once dated Jake Gyllenhaal, nothing came of that alleged fling.

The groom - an investment banker - is the son of former U.S. Reps. Marjorie Margolies-Mezvinsky (Pennsylvania) and Ed Mezvinsky (Iowa).

Congrats Chelsea & Marc!

Chelsea drags a** to keep up prior to big day in Rhinebeck!

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Chelsea Clinton...paparazzi swarm in frenzied build-up on Wedding Day!

Chelsea's big day thanks to Daddy!

Slick Willy approves of son-in-law!

The celebrity sightings started last evening in the tony enclave of Rhinebeck, New York - as guests who were invited to Chelsea Clinton's much-ballyhooed nupitals - began arriving to attend a well-planned rehearsal at an estimated cost of $250,000.00.

Bill Clinton, casually dressed in a black "t'" and slacks nabbed a lot of attention - for instance - when he stepped out of a chauffeured limo and proceeded to stroll through the throngs all smiles into one of the many quaint local establishments that dotted the picturesque main street.

In his wake, the locals kibbitzed and chatted each other up about the high-profile celebrity guest list.

In the mouths of many?

Gossips tittered about  Barbara Streisand and Sarah Jessica Parker - surely two of the most highly-visible celebs - to saunter into their little neck of the woods in recent years



When a shot of Babs filled the TV screen in my hospital room this morning,  alongside a report on her invite to the wedding, a big bouncey nurse voiced her blatant disapproval.

"Why did Chelsea invite her to the wedding?"

I pointed out that the Diva was one of slick Willy's big financial backers in his last bid for the Presidency.

At which point, I noted that Barbara once slept overnight at the White House.

"I think she had the hots for Bill, don't you," I was inclined to tease from the comfy confines of my hospital bed.

The nurse let out a belly-laugh at this juncture.

"I just betcha!"

One local was sure she caught sight of fashion designer Vera Wang.

That little tidbit added feul to the speculation that Chelsea would sashay down the aisle in one of her exquisite creations.

"The Bridesmaids will be wearing Wang, too," another asserted from the sidelines.

But, Hillary - it's been rumored - has remained loyal to long-time pal - Oscar De La Renta - in that fashion regard.

Big "O" sightings abounded around town, too. 

Was Oprah Winfrey really in their humble midst?

Gifting shiny new cars - left, right and center - no doubt.

No Steadman in sight, however.

At dusk, after rehearsal broke, there was a flurry of activity as guests shuffled off  to an old Historic Inn for cocktails with the Clintons.

"Oh, look. There's Madeleine Albright," cried out one excited bystander.

Meanwhile, media hounds jockeyed for position, and mused about the details.

After all, it's all about the details!

Although most struggling American couples (first starting out) shell out approximately $24,000.00 for their special day at the local chapel, the scuttlebutt persists that the Clintons have gone way over the top with a spiffy  "once-in-a-lifetime" ceremony expected to run up receipts in the neighborhood of 2 to 3 million smackeroos.

In retrospect, it appears that staggering sums of moolah the former President drummed up from speaking engagements around the globe in recent years (emoted at an estimated $100,000.00 a pop) may come in handy when the well-turned-out Barista presents the bill.

In one respect, the Clinton's may have lucked out.

Insiders whisper that the menu will be predominated by Vegan dishes, in view of the fact, Chelsea is a big fan of Vegetarianism.



American voters may recall press clips of Ms. Clinton nursing bumper crops in the organic garden on the White House roof, and later shuffling around the state-of-the-art kitchen, whipping up nutritious Vegan meals for the1st family.

How much could a few lousey vegetables (and tofu) cost in the grand scheme of things?

The wedding march is expected to strike up at 6 p.m. this evening.

But, invited guests may not be beaming in the church aisles, unless they first pass muster with a security detail that is handling the evening's blessed event with military-style precision.

At the door of the Church, armed guards will scan guest lists and photos, to ensure there are no gate crashers at-the-ready to hitch a joy ride on the High Society event of the year.

Pssst!

See 'ya at the kitchen door!

Madeleine ready to catch the bouquet!

http://www.julianayrs.com/

Chelsea Clinton...ties knot in chi-chi enclave amidst celebrity guests! July 31st!

Chelsea to don designer gown fashioned in snow white!

(though not a Virgin)

Quaint Rhineback

(New York)

To the locals, it is being hailed as the wedding of the century.

Nothing but the best for Daddy's little girl!

Though a fresh-faced beauty now, Americans may recall those awkward days in the glare of the spotlight at the White House, when it wasn't always so for the once-gangly young teen who blossommed into womanhood a pretty young woman nonetheless.

Did a surgeon's hand play any part in it?

Of course, I am referring to Chelsa Clinton, the daughter of a former U.S. President.

After a long sensible courtship, Chelsea and her reliable beau - Marc Mezvinsky - are finally headed for wedded bliss on July 31st.

In many respects, the much-anticipated union, is nothing short of a fairy tale in the making.

The handscome couple have chosen to tie-the-knot amdist the luxurious trappings of an exquisite turn-of-the-century estate designed to resemble the Grand Trianon at Versailles.

The Beaux Arts mansion, set atop a high bluff, was built by legendary tycoon John Jacob Astor IV.

In spite of the fact there has been a bold-faced attempt to shroud the high-profile union of the two celebrated families in secrecy, as usual, insiders "in-the-know" have managed to feret out enough details to satiate the hunger of the locals and media hounds craving juicy gossip about all the delicious goings-on in their midst.

Terrapin Restaurant, a popular watering hole in the heart of town, will cater the rehearsal dinner.

There are sure to be ample generous servings of the prime dish (horseradish-encrusted Ahi tuna with miso aioli) to feed the inner circle (a picky lot, by the way) according to sources.

Although the guest list is top secret, it is rumored that President Obama and 1st Lady Michelle have been offered the opportunity to breeeze into town to catch the nupitals under the close scrutiny and watchful eyes of a top-notch detail of seasoned FBI security personnel.

White House staff swear up-and-down that the President will not attend, though.

Ted Turner, feisty talk-show host Oprah Winfrey, and politico Barbra Streisand - are allegedly on the guest list - alongside respected film director Steven Spielberg and Kate Capshaw.

I guess my invitation must have been waylaid by gremlins at the U.S. Post Office.

Rhinebeck has been dubbed “the Hamptons of the North."

And, is a paparazzi heaven.

Over the years, locals (approximately nine-thousand residents swell the ranks in the quaint Gatsby-style enclave) have managed to quietly mingle with the likes of Sarah Jessica Parker, Uma Thurman (Kill Bill), and Drew Barrymore (without much fuss).

On the heels of titillating leaks, enterprising gossip hounds have managed to fan the media frenzy, that do the professional proud.

For example, insiders are whispering that a slew of guests will be hunkering down at the Beekman Arms (a ninety-minute drive from the town) which is a Bill & Hillary mainstay when it comes to wining and dining the celebrated elite.

Because Amtrak rattles through the Hudson River side of Astor Courts, a neighbor has speculated, that the wedding party may snap up all available lounge cars to comfortably ferry guests to and from their tony Manhattan digs just two hours south.

Or, was that just a red herring tossed out, to throw snoops off the track?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Chelsea wisely stayed out of dirty politics!

Slick Willy's top campaign contributor invited!

http://www.julianayrs.com

Chelsea Clinton...making a difference with CHAI (Clinton HIV/AIDS Initiative)! Donate today...

When Chelsea Clinton was trotted out on the campaign trail last fall to rustle up some votes from her own age group, I was a little reticent about jumping on the band wagon.

In spite of the fact I very rarely found fault with Chelsea per se - after all, she carried herself well and acted in good taste whenever she appeared on behalf of her Mom at public and political rallies - it was the woman, Hillary Clinton, who kept me snickering from afar.

Nope, I never warmed up to the pant-suited politician gave me the willies (no pun intended) and made me feel ill at ease.

Hillary was just too disingenuous - in the words of the PREZ - and conniving for the good of the country, in my estimation.

Whitewater was always at the back of mind, fanning the flames of doubt, too!

Now that Obama is firmly ensconced in the White House, and Hillary is Secretary of State, I did not expect to hear a peep out of Chelsea again.

Wrong!

Young Chelsea has taken up a cause.

The pretty young gal is now involved with project CHAI, a project funded under the auspices of her father's charitable organization, The William Clinton Foundation.

In her communication, Chelsea informed me how exciting her involvement with CHAI has been to date.

"This summer, I had the great opportunity of traveling to Africa with my father, where we met Jean Pierre, a young boy in a rural village in Rwanda. Jean Pierre is alive and well today because of the antiretroviral treatments that the Clinton HIV/AIDS Initiative (CHAI) was able to make accessible to him."

"Jean Pierre told us that he wants to grow up to be a doctor and give more people a chance to live a healthy life.

"Jean Pierre's story is inspiring, not just because he's benefiting from the work of everyone at CHAI, but also because he's leading by example with his lifetime goal of giving back and serving others through medicine."

Chelsea impressed upon me her hope that generous Americans will consider supporting CHAI and the Clinton Foundation's work in the U.S. and around the globe in a myriad of ways, but specifically by virtue of a donation.

"Gifts of any size make a very real difference," she noted passionately.

For example, $15 provides a life-saving food package for an HIV-positive child for one month, while $30 pays for 15 dosing tools for physicians and pharmacists to help accurately dose children on HIV/AIDS treatment.

A generous gift of $80 ensures that eight community health workers can provide monitoring of adherence and medication intake for all HIV-positive people in a Malawian village for a week.

And believe it or not, $150 provides access to medical care and support -including transport to and from a treatment center, counseling, and nutrition - to one HIV-positive child in India for a year.

Why not consider coughing up some dough today, eh?

In addition to CHAI, it appears that there are other worthy causes on the agenda at the Foundation, too.

Transforming Ideas Into Action: Clinton Global Initiative

The Clinton Global Initiative is a project of the Clinton Foundation that brings together a community of global leaders, university students, and private citizens to identify and implement innovative solutions to the world's most pressing challenges, including poverty alleviation, climate change, global health, and education.

Treating HIV/AIDS & Malaria: Clinton HIV/AIDS Initiative

The Clinton HIV/AIDS Initiative is helping to turn the tide on the HIV/AIDS pandemic by working with governments and other partners to increase the availability of high-quality AIDS care and treatment for people in need, lower the cost of essential tests and treatments, and strengthen health systems in the developing world.

Fighting Childhood Obesity: Alliance For a Healthier Generation

The Alliance for a Healthier Generation, a partnership between the Clinton Foundation and the American Heart Association, is dedicated to ending the increase in childhood obesity and helping all kids and their families lead healthy, active lives.

Promoting Economic Opportunity: Clinton Economic Opportunity Initiative

The Clinton Economic Opportunity Initiative is helping families and individuals keep more of the money they make by supporting state and city efforts to promote access to basic financial services. CEO also matches inner-city entrepreneurs with successful business leaders to help them grow their businesses and flourish in an urban economy.

Creating Sustainable Development in Africa: Clinton Hunter Development Initiative

The Clinton Hunter Development Initiative is working in Rwanda and Malawi to launch projects that generate income, increase agricultural productivity, and enable sustainable growth to alleviate poverty.

Enabling Economic Development: Clinton Giustra Sustainable Growth Initiative

An innovative partnership between the Clinton Foundation, the private sector, governments, other NGOs and local communities, the Clinton Giustra Sustainable Growth Initiative is working with the natural resource industry to improve health and education programs and alleviate poverty, starting in Latin America.

Info: http://www.clintonfoundation.org/

http://www.julianayrs.com/

Chelsea Clinton...trotted out to sell t-shirts! No shame?

Just as a bunch of us were getting ready to don nifty party hats, click the heels of our dazzlin' Ruby Red slippers, and mirthfully break into a raucous rendition of Oz's - "Ding Dong the Witch is Dead" - I received a curious e-mail from Hillary's pride and ultimate joy, the lovely Chelsea Clinton.

The e-mail, personally addressed to me, noted Hillary and Chelsea needed my help in making a critical decision!

At the precise moment I perused the heartfelt message, my inclination was to zip off an emotionally-charged e-mail myself.

"Get out while you can. Gracefully, if it's a possibility at this stage of the game."

But alas, Chelsea - like her parents - was inclined to flag a dead horse.

She was writing to ask that I vote on a t-shirt they'd like to put into commission for the next phase of their presidential campaign.

Yeah, that thump you heard was my jaw falling with a thud to the floor.

Chelsea proceeded with the kind of zest and enthusiasm only she could muster up,

"We recently launched a contest to design a campaign t-shirt and I couldn't believe the incredible response (nor could I). We got thousands of great entries (from the political pundits, I expect). They were creative (2 primary colors), inspirational (stump for Hillary. Hump for Bill), funny (We don't have no stinking papers), and beautiful (latest publicity stills of Hillary's derriere, no doubt). It was amazing to see the devotion to my mom's campaign come through in each t-shirt (one size fits all)."

Suffice to say, I was not aware there was any hipster fashion focus underway in the waning political dynasty realms.

I guess little things like putting gas in the car, paying the mortgage, and trotting off to the mailbox to see if my rebate check had arrived yet, have kept my thoughts focused elsewhere!

Chelsea (she is a sweet gal, isn't she?) continued with her snake-oil pitch,

"It wasn't easy to narrow it down, but we've chosen five we think are particularly great, and now we need your help in making our final decision. Please vote for your favorite design. The winning shirt will go on sale in our online campaign store."

Well, if the t-shirt offering is a cute way to raise much-needed cash, then God be with her.

However, if the purpose of the selection is to select a "t" for the next rally, I'd say, cut the losses and spring for lunch for the volunteers, instead

After all, Chelsea, the red carpet has been yanked out from under your Mother's sensible shoes - and if you hadn't noticed - the parade is chasing after the great white (and black) hope - Barack Obama - intoxicated with the idea of change, not casual outerwear!

To humor Ms. Clinton, I offered up some suggestions to chew on.

I kinda' like the the one that shows the four faces of Eve - um - Hillary.

While Clinton supporters would argue that the "t" depicts the many facets of Hillary's capabilities, others might stridently zero in on the image - and astutely note - it hones in on the duplicity of her character (doubled, for good measure).

The one about being knocked up - er - down is catchy. Yeah, we all know how Hillary came up from the school of hard knocks and what a feisty pit bull she can be when push comes to shove. I'm inclined to lean on a vote this way, myself.

But, the pant suit statement said it best.

The subtle inference - and a lesson well-learned - from a lady trying to crash the Old Boys' Network? When in a man's world, play hardball. Tease him with the fact you look better in a smart suit than the "suits" themselves.

They're sure to exclude 'ya, alright.

Megan McCain...clumsy, tacky earrings, gotta go!

Daddy's little girl has been helping out at the campaign office.

Yes, John McCain's daughter - Megan - has been pitching in!

Unlike Chelsea, the pretty young blond has been inclined to spill the beans to the press. After all, a photo op is a photo op.

When asked about the competition's daughter, McCain gushed that she admired Ms. Chelsea because, "...she is so graceful and she never makes a misstep."

In fact, she is no enamored of the Clinton's No. 1 daughter that she said she would welcome any advice she was inclined to offer up.

Psssst!

In the event your ships pass don't pass in the night, take note...the clumsy, oversized earrings you wore at the campaign office the other day, have got to hit the dust. Think Ballroom, not sleazy local dive.

It may be wise to ditch the fur cap, too; if Animal Rights Activists get a peak at the label and determine it is bona fide fur, watch out! You'll be first on their endangered list.

By the way, the fluff on your blog - tips on make-up and notes about your favs on the pop charts - is sure to land the votes of a few airheads. But, why not use your moment in the sun - and momentary influence - to educate and enlighten your fellow youth?

Just asking!

Chelsea Clinton...turns into babe!

Well, when I received the e-mail communication from Clinton's camp, about a family reunion of three generations of Clinton women in IOWA, I was inclined to respond with a yawn and a "ho hum".

But, always game for a smidgen of off-beat humor, I clicked on the link - at which point - a down-home video sprang forth in all its kitschy glory.

Whoa, dudes!

Was that truly Chelsea Clinton striding confidently out from under the shadow of her mother, Hillary?

Oh ma God! Chelsea has transformed from a ganglin', knock-kneed adolescent, into a bodacious babe!

Is it possible that the skilled hand of a - er - make-up artist has conjured up some luminous magic for the fresh-faced innocent?

I suppose now that slick Willy is raking in some dough from book proceeds, and wily Hillary is on the long and winding road to the White House, Ms. Chelsea has a bevy of hot studs aimin' to get into her - good graces!

I can only imagine the first question the lucky young fella is asked when he's invited to the family homestead to meet good ole' Dad...

Do you inhale, son?


Would a rose by any other name be so sweet?