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Showing posts with label Tom Cruise. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tom Cruise. Show all posts

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Movie Posters...Bob Peak Art creations! Academy of Motion Pictures Arts & Sciences!







Oft times it is the jazzy celebrated movie poster that lures film buffs into the Theatre.

To many connoisseurs they are a unique American Art Form.

Many rare promotional fliers have become collector's items, too 

In fact, when Tom Cruise's last big-budget action adventure flopped at the box-office (Knight & Day), critics blamed a lackluster poster which they argued confused potential theatre-goers about what was being sold at the box-office.

You know what they say.

Packaging! Packaging! Packaging!

If you're intrigued by the medium, then you  may want to trot over to Beverly Hills and catch the ground-breaking Poster Art of Bob Peak which is on hand over the weekend at the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences.

The display is dazzling, to say the least.

Examples of Peak's distinctive creations include posters for Apocalypse Now, Every Which Way But Loose, and Superman.

The free exhibit is housed on the Fourth Floor Gallery 'til Sunday.

See 'ya there!

Gallery
Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences
Fourth Floor Gallery
8949 Wilshire Blvd
Beverly Hills, CA

http://www.oscars.org/

http://www.thetattler.biz/





Poster blamed for Cruise flop!

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Tom Cruise..."Knight & Day" sparks debate! Lead horse to water, at least...




Motorcycle publicity still better poster choice?




Shortly after I posted my review of "Knight and Day" - the Tom Cruise spy thriller - the hits went through the stratosphere at the Tattler.

In my caption, I shouted - "Tom Cruise...He's back!" - which must have triggered an emotion or two judging by the response.

Post:  06/27/10

http://ijulian.blogspot.com/2010/06/tom-cruisehes-back-knight-day-quirky.html

Industry honchos, media pundits (and fans) appeared to have written the action-adventure off as a "bomb" based on a slow start at the box-office and negative buzz on the Internet.

In fact, I penned an article on the issue wherein I wondered aloud if "Tom" was still suffering from lingering image problems due to a bizarre couch-jumping incident, his involvement with the flakey Ron L. Hubbard's Scientology "outfit", and a controversial stint on Matt Lauer's hot seat in which he came off as a total pig-headed a**.

Post:  06/26/10

http://ijulian.blogspot.com/2010/06/tom-cruisehes-back-knight-day-quirky.html

So, what gives?

Essentially, the Knight and Day fiasco all boils down to marketing (misguided) and the way "Knight and Day" was promoted.

In the morning LA Times, Patrick Goldstein pointed out that the poster - which featured a stunning graphic of the two stars - was part 'n parcel of the problem.

He argued that the failure of the studio brass to feature the identifiable faces of the two stars - Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz - may have been a fatal lack of judgment in the total scheme of things which negatively impacted the project (and perceptions of it).

In response, Tony Sella (co-President of marketing at Fox) scoffed at Goldsmith's wild idea that the studio was hiding the faces of the two stars because their appeal was lacking in a demographic they were striving to lure into theatres come opening day.

"I was doing an homage to fabled title designer Saul Bass," Sella fessed up.

"It was a way for us to signal that this was a different kind of adult movie.The whole campaign was designed to evoke a film like "North by Northwest (a Hitchcock classic)."

Because I attended film school, and have a background in the film industry in a myriad of capacities, I understood that.

If anything, the concept intrigued me - hence - my decision to screen it in spite of a bevy of biting press clips (and stinky rumors denouncing it).

I agree with Sella that the commercial spots - in which Cruise appeared to be a wacko dude kidnapping a woman - may have fallen short  in getting the film's essential storyine across.

If the studio noted - in a nutshell - that this was a spy thriller (and that Cruise character's was on a ultra-secret mission) Cruise fans and spy-thriller enthusiasts would have flocked to the theatres from the get-go when theatre doors swung open.

It appears, in retrospect, that filmgoers took a - "let's wait and see" - attitude.

Movie dollars only stretch so far these days, after all.

Call me sophisticated, if you will, but the quirky "promo" didn't phase me.

Frankly, I tire of "trailers" that reveal so much of the plot, that you end up saying to yourself:

"Why bother going to see the film now?

The studio's big sin was they didn't give enough "tease" - and as a result - left filmgoers and fans in the proverbial dark.

Fox brass  didn't even lead the horse to water!

 How do you expect them to drink?



Sunday, June 27, 2010

Tom Cruise...He's back! Knight & Day quirky thriller that entertains!







Far and wide, fans and critics alike, have been poohing-poohing the notion that Tom Cruise's - "Knight and Day" - will restore his flaggng career and propel him over the top into the glare of the spotlight as a full-fledged A-list star once again.

Actually, from the prospective of  a romantic/thriller/comedy - mixing genres is generally risky business by the way - the quirky little engine that could has succeeded as a fast-paced funny feature with a lot of original material that resonates in the ticket-holder.

Personally, I was surprised at how fresh some of the schtick  was.

Sight gags took fans by surprise, playful moments with dialogue caused the audience to roar, and unexpcted sidesteps jolted folks enough to pull them effectively into the one-note storyline.

Although the script was not Oscar material, it managed to provide a solid framework, so that the actors were able to flesh out meaty characters.

Cameron Diaz is amazing in this movie!

The pretty blond handles drama equally as well as comedy (a requirement here).

Of all her performances, this is the one gem that stretched her creative muscles, to her advantage.

Tom, in some respects, goes backwards in time to roles like Jerry McQuire and Risky Business in a desperate effort to conjure up the ingredients of a persona that once worked well for him on the silver screen.

However, in "Knight and Day", he is adventurous enough to take some risks (which pay off).

I loved Mr. Cruise's performance.

Kudos!

This film - though not totally dark - is a borderline black comedy piece.

In the final analysis, the right (twisted) mindset may be required to fully appreciate this 3 Star film.





Saturday, June 26, 2010

Tom Cruise..."Knight and Day" slow out-of-gate! Top gun losin' it?





 
A role in the feature film - TAPS - was his first big break.

And, in an interview with Charlie Rose, the handsome actor poignantly recalled that it was a dizzying whirlwind turning-point in his career.

When he flew into town - Sean Penn (co-star) - not only picked up the aspiring wannabee at the airport - but also invited him to stay in a cottage on his property.

Do you suppose any hanky-panky went down?

Ah, so that's where those gay rumors started up!

As to the work itself, Cruise executes all his own stunts.

Frankly, I find that practise DUMB!

An actor's body is his "instrument' - a tool - which he facilitates to flesh out a character.

Without it, an actor is pretty much up a creek without a paddle.

Leave the tricky stunts to the professionals, Tom.
In the heady day of the eighties and nineties, Cruise was a megastar savoring all the trappings of a spoiled A-list performer.

The pint-sized performer actor could do no wrong.

Today, however, the fact that Mr. Cruise is a practising scientologist often gets the odd-ball mamma's boy into trouble.

But, nothing can hold a candle to the couch-jumping incident on Oprah or the fiery chat with Matt Lauer on the subject of psychiatry.

When those scary moments unfolded unexpectedy across the old boob-tube, the public's perceptions of the  diminutive star  flew all over the map.

Although Oprah's fave guest has managed to rehabilitate his image somewhat in the past few months - the talented "Interview with a Vampire" star - is facing other dilemmas.

Ticket sales have been dismal for "Knight and Day", for instance.

How would Tom  describe what Catheron Diaz (co-star) was like in four words?

"Bright, fun, generous, and talented," he smiled, after reflecting for a moment or two.
According to the Los Angeles Times, the film raked in a paltry $3.8 million opening day. 

In contrast, Tim Allen's new release - "Toy story 3 - rustled up 13 million Ka-chings.

Studio brass weren't totally in the dark about the bumpy ride ahead, though.

Sneak peaks at pre-release junkets determined that fans &  filmgoers in general weren't thrilled with the studio's quirky offering.

Roger Ebert gave the "comeback" film  three stars, though.

The NY Times called it "loud, seemingly interminable, and altogether incoherent."

"Hollywood has been buzzing the studio might drop 'MI4' - Mission Impossible 4 - if 'Knight' doesn't fair well at the box office," one insider whispered.

Like many a struggling actor, Tom can always fall back on waiting tables inbetween gigs.

.



Thursday, June 10, 2010

MTV Movie Awards...wild & woolly! Sandra Bullock lipstick lesbo kiss! Vampires score big!




The poor man's Julia Roberts!





The MTV Movie Awards were - wild and woolly, prone to lapses of judgment, rife with high-spirited hi-jinks - even poignant at times.

A lipstick lesbian, the alter-ego of Tom Cruise (in a show-stopping dance routine with Jennifer Lopez prettying up the theatrical terrain), and a bobbing Mark Wahlberg loose-as-a-goose caused tongues to wag at water coolers around the country the next day.

The racy ribald humor and streak of rat-a-tat expletives (for the most part nipped in the bud by quick thinking censors - except for a zinger or two - that broke through the shackles intended to harness them) didn’t surprise many.

What do you expect from a network hell-bent on churning out hip edgy hip material to satiate the robust free-wheeling organic tastes of their enviable demographic.

Hands down, MTV gets the nod for hustling up a smattering of precious television moments, that the competition will be struggling to match 'til network television doomsday.

Just around the corner, I expect.

Today, it was no surprise, then - to happen across a news clip in one of the morning papers - which reported that MTV was inclined to apologize for the raunchy material that splashed out over the airwaves non-stop to the delight of rapt viewers.

Ho-Hum.

Business as usual.

In true Hollywood style, the brass at MTV milked the much-anticipated musical extravaganza, for all it was worth.

To entice Sandra Bullock out-of-hiding, for example, the suits created a special Movie Award sure to drum up a ratings blockbuster if the scandal-ridden gal graced the stage with her presence.

Unfortunately, opportunistic starlets - like Scarlett Johansson - seized on the moment to thrust themselves into the glare of the spotlight.

In one of those awkward - you had to be there off-the-wall moments - the lipstick lesbo strode up to the stage begging for a kiss.

Say what?

Talk about queer!

Good sport that she is, Sandra plunked a deep one (somewhat reminiscent of the tongue probe that Al Gore surprised Tipper with) on her pouty lips.

Yeah, a real gagger.

That out of the way, Sandra uttered up one of the sanest sentiments of the night.

“Can we get back to normal now?”

When Tom Cruise gyrated on stage - with shaved head and bizarre wardrobe get-up - many anticipated another golden “couch” moment in spite of the fact Oprah was nowhere in sight.

Surprise!

The former mega-star - struggling for credibility in Tinsel-town after he slipped through the cracks in recent days for head-shaking screwball antics - pulled off an entertaining performance with a slightly out-of-character Jennifer Lopez at his side.

Wonders never cease.

The show continued at a dizzying pace - jokes jolted, fizzled, titillated, struck a chord or didn’t - go figure!

Uh-huh!

The smorgasbord of visual and audio delights was nothing short of a zany parade, with something for everyone, amidst a zoo-like atmosphere that stuck to the wall.

But, the big winner of the night was Twilight.

The sequel - Eclipse - nabbed 5  trophies - to the delight of fans who went wild at the mere mention of their cult hit!

Yes, the Vampire genre continues to propel the industry forward.

For MTV, it's a good marriage with  the Twilight franchise.

Both, will suck the life out of you, if you let ‘em.


Monday, October 6, 2008

John McCain...Top Gun! Not. Cocky Pilot? Uh-huh...

Cocky young Maverick flew by seat of pants...



As the reports filter in about John McCain's days as a fighter pilot, the reminisces start to sound a lot like a page or two out of the feature film script - "Top Gun" - which starred Cruise and Kilmer a couple of years back.

There's a lot of talk that Johnny was a real cocky son-of-a-bit**.

Like the character Maverick - in the film - McCain was inclined to push the envelope, fly by the seat of his pants, and take uncalculated risks.

Oftentimes, just like Cruise's character, McCain went down in flames.

And, that is the subject of some debate, now.


In his biography, McCain would prefer to look back - not in anger - but through rose-colored glasses.

But, frankly - to some - his recall of events is shameless.

Or, is he just having a Senior moment?

For instance, the presidential candidate's recollection of events surrounding one hairy airplane mishap, was way out-of-whack.

"The engine quit while I was practising landings," he noted matter-of-fact, on the written parchment.

At least O.J. Simpson was clever enough to try to determine if there were any witnesses to the events before he opened his mouth in defense when his latest fiasco with the law went down in Las Vegas.

In this instant case - an investigator who witnessed the events - is quite adamant there wasn't any inexplicable engine failure as alleged by the wrinkly old dude.

In fact, investigators came to the conclusion that McCain wasn't on the ball.

In the opinion of the experts, the accident occurred because the power setting on the instrument panel was too low to maintain level flight in a turn.

Well, every Maverick is capable of running some interference, now and then.

But three times, you say?

According to informed sources in the Navy, that number is accurate.

In each instance, investigative teams faulted McCain for error in judgment.

It has taken wild horses to drag the facts out of him, though.

In one stinky incident - silly clowning around while operating expensive Government equipment - resulted in a near calamity.

Should American voters give him a crack at Air Force 1?

In a Skyraider aircraft in Southern Spain, for instance, he flew into electrical wires which caused a black-out.

A miscalculation caused a T-2 trainer jet in Virginia to crash, in another incident he downplayed, too.

By Naval standards - the three nail-biting incidents were cause for concern - according to a former air force pilot, Michael L. Barr.

Mr. Barr is an Internationally-known aviation safety expert who teaches at the USC Aviation and Safety Security Program today with 137 combat missions in Vietnam under his belt.

In the case of any pilot - three troubling mishaps - would definitely signal sloppy flying skills and a lack of sound judgement, for sure.

In large part - the problem stemmed from a tendency on the part of McCain - to be overconfident, cocky, and a fearless risk-taker at the Government's expense.

In the final analysis, the ballsy flyer over-estimated his limited skills.

Yup, a swinging di** got in the way.

But, high connections in the right places, prevented McCain from getting the axe.

Because McCain fell under a long line of Admirals in a family way, inestimable privileges were bestowed upon the handsome young buck.

The facts support the contention, today.


On occasion, for instance, McCain savored dalliances at the Captain's table, while fellow officers languished in cramped quarters below deck.

In another glorious Kodak moment, McCain was handed the prestigious task of maneuvering a commemorative landing on the deck of the Enterprise.


Fortunately, he didn't have to bail out last minute.

According to Maurice Rishel - who commanded McCain's VA-64 Squadron in early 1961 when it was deployed in the Mediterranean - the unit nick-named the kid "Ace McCain".

Although he was a spoiled brat (born with a silver spoon in his mouth) he did his job, Rishel confessed without any qualms.

Just like John Kerry before him, foes are getting out the hatchets to bury one in McCain's back, after-the-fact.

Uh-huh.

Where Eagles dare, heroes fall.

For McCain, though, ignorance is bliss.

He'll ride through it all unscathed, I just betcha.

After all, that soldier boys's got missiles up his a**.


Just like in the movies, John always got the girl..

Saturday, January 19, 2008

Tom Cruise...Scientology sh** hits fan; top gun threatens lawsuits over video!



Well, the old **it hit the fan for Tom Cruise this week.



Yesterday morning, a news outlet featured a videotape of the megastar, engaging in secret ceremonies behind closed doors at Scientology headquarters.



If the disgruntled former member of the cult, who released it, intended to "embarrass" Mr. Cruise, they accomplished that feat hands down!



In one shot, Tom enters an "S" meeting, stops to salute a fuzzy blow-up photo of the creator of the organization - Ron L. Hubbard - then proceeds onstage to acknowledge one of the upper echelon of the odd-ball group that raises eyebrows daily.



I surmise the curious elbow-lift infers that all Scientology enthusiasts are "foot soldiers" in the war against, what? Ignorance? Prejudice against the Church's "personality tests"? Overzealous critics harping about the fact that Scientology is not a religion?



Heh, in the inner recesses of my mind, I do seem to recall that Mr. Hubbard was a former Science Fiction writer. Isn't Scientology just a surreal fantasy, conjured up by a very active, demented imagination?



Worse yet, Tom was caught in the flesh, talking Scientologese!



Yup, he babbled with gushing enthusiasm about SP, and KSG, and all manner of things, hidden in a secret code. SP? "Suppress the people", is what it stands for, according to insiders.



And KSG? "Keep Scientology Going" apparently.



Well, if you have a deranged mind, to.



Do you suppose they have a secret handshake too?



I must say, I was a bit envious of that Gold Medallion swinging lavishly around Tom's squeaky-clean neck a few months ago...an award, you say, for his worthwhile contributions to the sect - um - Church?



To be fair to the star, and in a bold-faced effort to gain a different perspective on 'em, I inputted the word Scientology into the online dictionary at Webster's web site. The word isn't even listed, let alone mentioned in a possible list of suspects.



As I was preparing this post, a 20/20 promo for a segment on the "cruiser", sprang across the screen...so, I was inclined to tune in.



Clips catching Tom demonizing psychiatry were downright scary - especially in view of the fact - he alleges that scientologists have the “the authority".



On what?



If this revelation (no connection to the scriptures) wasn't enough to hurl Cruise fanatics over the brink, they hit bullion when Andrew Morton - who released an unauthorized biography this week on the diminutive actor - was on hand to toss in his two cents worth.



"Tom thinks they are super beings," he actually opined with a straight face.



Ironically, the interviewer, added,



"After observing Mr. Cruise the past few months, it appears to me that he needs some psychiatric therapy."



Ouch!



If asked, maybe Dr. Phil will step in and lend a hand.



On a morning show, the reporter noted that word from Cruise's camp is that any individuals posting the video on their web site, will face litigation.



Why don't you just zap 'em with your super powers, Tom?



Andrew Morton's timely tome apparently focuses on the childhood years, as well. The insightful writer uncovered gems like...the fact that Tom collected model airplanes (Top Gun, right?) and played the "sun" in a 5th grade pageant.



As to the quirky, early stint on stage, a former teacher noted that,



"Even 30 years later, it still gives me goose bumps (thinking about it)."



When it was also revealed that Tom Cruise once impersonated Woody Woodpecker, a Bay Area Reporter quipped,



"We'd bet his Woody is memorable."



My money says Cruise suffers from a Napoleon (small man's) complex.









Tom, psychiatrists usually prefer a horizontal position on the couch...

Monday, December 17, 2007

Chelsea Lately...mean girl tart. Off-the-wall E Entertainment comedian...


The moon must have been - trine, or retrograde, or something - what with all the weird vibrations and screw-ball antics going on all 'round me.

As I channel-surfed at a fellow dude's digs around grub hour, I stumbled across a curious E Entertainment re-run - come lately or Chase somethin' - or other.

The show titillated me, somewhat!

My best bud noted that "Chelsea" (the hostess with the moistest) was one of those slutty Lindsay Lohan "mean girls".

Ah, it dawned on me now, why she was being so nasty to the guests!

Notwithstanding, on occasion - the dizzy, sexy, bimbo blonde babe - was prone to ask some pretty insightful hard-hitting questions as they squirmed in their comfy seats.

For starters, when VJ Logan - Smartest Model in America - sprawled down on the couch next to the show's host - Ben Stein - she poignantly asked,

"Do you have a lot of gay guys comin' on to ya?"

The handsome stud laughingly noted that having a brown belt was a prerequisite for a male model - not to hold up his tight, packed, faded jeans - but to deftly fight the limp-wristed dudes off.

I expect his initials - VJ - stand for "very jock".

One of his eyebrows was wandering off a little too much for my liking, though.

Yes, VJ was a bit too preened, for my tastes.

I guess he's what ya'd call a "metro sexual".

A friend of Ryan Seacrest, no doubt.

Ben Stein, silent 'til now, was probed further.

"So, tell me, how long have you and VJ (stands for very jock?) been married?"

On the heels of this dumb probe which elicited a pregnant pause, she continued.

"Seriously, folks, what is the point of determining if models are intelligent?"

Stein responded, rightly so.

"Well, you know, people want to know if good-looking people are smart."

Yeah?

Not me, I just lay 'em down and go at it, if you know what I mean!

Darn!

When VJ asked Chase - uh - Chelsea - if she'd like to see his chiseled abs, the perky hostess jumped at the chance to peek at his succulent tender flesh.

But, the show obviously was hindered by a stifling low-budget.

After all, when VJ thrust up his sweater, the camera failed to pan in.

In fact - when Chelsea stroked the gorgeous model's smoothe hard body - only she and VJ were privy to the sensual moment.

Can't afford a zoom lens, E?

Or, maybe VJ wanted a bump (more cash) to flash the bod naked on the idiot box?

In one odd-ball moment - well, she's inclined to slip into a few - Ms. Lately assured the audience she'd give Tom Cruise material a wide berth

"Cause he's probably got lawyers hangin' around inside the woodwork."

What a scandal.

When one guest made an off-the-wall remark about Marie Osmond, the mean girl softened a bit.

"Gee, if I made a negative comment about Donnie's sister, I'd feel like I attacked the American flag, or something."

Her gaggle of back-up side-kicks - a smidgen of comics - amounted to a handful of squirming worms.

No, they weren't clever or witty, not a bit funny ha-ha.

Well, one joke about a Mormon's six wives all having a headache one night, wasn't so bad.

But, when I realized the show was taped during the writer's strike, it was obvious the picket lines had taken their toll on the quality of the show.

In another "bit" - I guess it's what they used to refer to in TV's heyday as a comedy "sketch" - Lately asked an attorney how to defend herself in the event actor Scott Baio's penis ever slapped her in the face.

I swear, I'm not makin' this s**t up!

At this juncture, I flipped the dial!

Over at "Soup" (Greg Kinnear's previous gig) the camera was focused on a close-up shot of David Beckham on a couch in tight white undies - with shirt in a fly-away position - revealing fabulous rippled abs.

Suddenly, the soccer stud's crotch started to pulsate wildly!

Then, a frothy explosion of somethin' or other, ejaculated all over the place!

Becks - you do inspire fantasies - even among male hosts who doth protest too much!

I couldn't help but wonder at this point, what does "E" stand for?

"Erudite" Entertainment?

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Tom Cruise...vanity be thy name?

Did I pull a boner?


If you were paying attention to the full-page ads for the feature film "LIONS for LAMBS" in recent weeks, you undoubtedly noticed some curious goings-on!

Shortly after the film - which had a tepid opening performance - was released, snippets of reviews touting Cruise's acting ability nudged their way to the top of the advertisements in all their radiance. (!)

Of course, many were under the impression, that "LIONS for LAMBS" was a Robert Redford film; after all, the SUNDANCE kid starred and directed, right?

Wrong!

Actually, "LIONS" was the first project Cruise and his producer-partner, Paula Wagner, undertook since Tom got the boot from Paramount.

If you recall, Sumner Redstone (Head of Paramount) did not renew Cruise's contract with the studio biggie because he felt that the star's outside activities - an involvement with the controversial Church of Scientology, for instance - were hurting box office receipts.

Notwithstanding, it's evident at this juncture, that the spotlight was placed on Cruise's acting - by virtue of his own hand!

Think about it...

As Executive Producer on "Lions for Lambs" - Tom was "top dog" - who managed and controlled publicity for the feature.

One has to wonder, then - was it vanity?

A big ego, perhaps.

Or, just plain old insecurity, that prompted Cruise to put his own reviews upfront and center in advertisements in all the major dailies, above everyone else in the cast?

You see, Tom made a classic mistake in the business, which would be wise to pay heed to.

True, for a number of years - the No. 1 Box Office actor - basked in good press, kind thoughts, and was showered with all good intentions.

In addition, one of the sexiest men alive, was the subject of image-boosting articles, a proliferation of flattering photos, and a lot of ego-stroking; uh-huh, from all quarters of the business.

Why?

In the early days of his fledgling career, Tom was smart enough to recognize the importance of an excellent publicist - so - the astute star proceeded to hire a handful of the most capable, powerful, PR agents in all of Hollywood.

With the stellar team at the helm, all was well in Tinseltown, for decades to come.

But, out-of-the-blue one day - without warning - the agitated actor (for some inexplicable reason) fired his loyal Public Relations folks - yeah, he sent 'em packing!

Oh my, it appears he opened Pandora's box, because all manner of strange occurrences befell him.

Suddenly, Tom was fighting with Brook Shields about psychiatry on National Television, jumping on couches, and tooling around town on a - what?

A motorcycle!

The subliminal message was "crystal clear"...the aging Lothario was pining for the heady days when he was once a TOP GUN.

Mid-life crisis?

Bottom line, Cruise was spilling out negative print as fast as the presses could run it...

And, before you could say - "Mission Impossible" - Cruise's image was not only in tatters, but his whole career was in a free fall, to the bottom of showbiz infamy.

Up until the exit of his handlers, there hadn't been any risky business to speak of; in fact, Tom had been blessed with good fortune.

Yes, he was in the enviable position to dictate the questions fielded at exclusive interview sessions, pick and choose the snippets of chit-chat to incorporate into news features, and - most importantly - was able to appease the beast inside...an obvious control-freak, lurking beneath the sunny, outgoing surface.

But all that evaporated into thin air when he ventured into the unknown, after sending his Public Relations officers, packing.

From the sidelines, naysayers titter, that the once affable star is a hair's breath away from the dreaded B-list.

But, with $$$ in the bank, for the moment he's secure - financially - at least.

Tom, you once had us at "hello", what happened?



I did not have sex with that man!



A forced kiss?

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Lions for Lambs...much ado about nothing. Movie review!



With much anticipation, I awaited the screening of the feature film, "Lions for Lambs"; after all, the buzz prior to its slated release hinted that it would be the cinematic event of the year.

After elbowing my way through the crush of excited filmgoers at Mann's Chinese Theatre, I slipped into my seat anxious for the silver screen to light up.

Within the first ten minutes, my hopes plummeted.

The opening scenes were awkward, talky, and amateurish in style.

For starters - the story devices the producers facilitated to weave three tales - failed to conjure up any intrigue, drama, or thrills.

Political potboiler?

Pooh!

The scripted messages embedded in this high-budget fiasco failed to strike a chord, too.

Meryl Streep plays a journalist invited to a Senator's office (Tom Cruise) for a hush-hush meeting to discuss one-on-one a bold-faced strike on Afghanistan.

The aim of the military action, according to the polished politician (outfitted in a striking starched-white neatly-pressed dress shirt and well-fitting designer suit) is to alter the unsavory image of the political machine on watch in Washington - and ultimately - restore confidence and faith to the American people.

The scenes set in the Senator's office have been crafted - if you can call it that - to throw out arguments in support of the "war".

Frankly, the scenario is not plausible.

For example - Streep's character is invited to Irving's lair with the promise of an exclusive on looming strike-action hatched by the powers-that-be in Washington - which they surmise will give the military leverage, cure all ills, and put America back on track as a superpower.

In the process, Irving boldly asserts that the sagging image of the United States, will summarily be rehabilitated on the world stage.

In fact - Cruise's character laments at one juncture - that he'll do "whatever it takes" for the scheme to work.

For starters, it's highly unlikely that a journalist would be invited to a clandestine meeting of this nature, at a Senator's office. It further stretches one's credulity to imagine that any politician would ever confide in a reporter about such highly-sensitive military maneuvers.

More startling - the filmgoer is expected to believe a professional reporter would compromise their journalist ethics - and turn in a news item guided by the hand of a politician with unsavory motives.

Another problem at issue is Cruise.

In this movie, I imagine the script called for the Irving character to be something of a sleazy snake-oil-salesman, pitching tough sells, to be passed on to the unsuspecting American public through the media.

Cruise's acting - or lack of it - poses a dilemma.

He postures, struts, and leans over a desk - at one point the finnicky actor crisply stretches the suit jacket over the back of a chair - but all the mannerisms and affectations are at a loss to conceal the fact he lacks the acting chops and the depth and maturity to pull the characterization off.

In this role, he mirrors all his other shallow, on-camera stints.

When he's all bluster and externalized gestures - Cruise should be internalizing and emoting - from the inside out.

He's unconvincing.

A handful of actors on the A-roster list would have sunk their teeth into this role and turned out a multi-faceted performance worthy of mention come Oscar-time.

When Streep notes to her boss - "he's trying to lubricate his way into the white house" - it's a bold-faced reference to the character's slickness.

Well, there needs to be some spit and shove to make it happen.

By the way, the message the screenwriter has him spinning is lame and convoluted.

Someone's propaganda, but who's pointing fingers?


The speeches about Americans - the Iraq war and how it's perceived - fall flat.

What a puppet show.

The at-times cliche material has been well-travelled and rings hollow - and so - amounts to much ado about nothing in the final analysis.

In fact, when Streep responds in confusion - and hesitates at a loss for words in one scene - the filmgoer has to seriously wonder if that is her actual response for real.

Undoubtedly, Ms. Streep has a clue this drivel will not fly in the theatres.

When Streep steps outside to hail a cab there is a telling ironic moment.

The vehicle says "Yellow Cab" on the side-door; however, it's actually painted orange and black.

This one image says it all.

"Lions for Lambs" claims to be one thing, but is actually something else.

If you just open your eyes - and steer clear of the smoke and mirrors - you won't be fooled.

See "Lions for Lambs" for what it is - a vehicle for Redford to expound his political views - and play the wise old owl.

Yeah, the Oscar-winning Director is under the mistaken impression, that he's shedding light in dark corners where Americans have not boldly ventured before.

Does he think filmgoers are stupid?

In his role as a Professor of Political Science, his screen time amounts to about forty minutes of precious celluloid - boring, stagy moments - which intercut back and forth between other two plot lines.

During the duration, his character attempts to cast a spell on a young student, with the ultimate aim of convincing the foggy-headed lad to stick it out in his Political Science class.

Redford should have relaxed into this role like a comfortable old shoe.

The slow pacing of his dialogue, the exacting - and what I expect he believes are thoughtful, meaningful pauses - somehow don't work, however.

At one point, the student says, "if you can't do..."

Yeah, we know, teach!

All flawed stale moments.

Notwithstanding, the interaction between the characters is dumb, and pointless.

When Professor Malley finally gets up out of the chair he's been glued to and gestures to a photograph of himself among fellow classmates from a bygone era - it's glaringly obvious that the ghostly image has been pasted on.

Gosh, what a bad patch job.

It's the details that hint at what a push-over Redford thought the audience would be.

Just hit 'em with some fast talk about the war - throw in a couple of high-profile stars - and get 'em all stirred up with some thought-provoking promotional teasers.

Yeah, we'll get 'em into the theatres.

In sum, it's a weak, silly excuse for a feature film.

Redford's assumption that his musings were the best take on the war (worthy of a big-screen foray into the subject matter) was a a costly mistake - not only for him as a director at the helm - but for the studio who pumped millions into this piece of crap.

Curiously - due to his own inept staging of the scenes - the audience ends up scrutinizing his face more closely.

Then, it dawns on the ticket-holder, just how old Redford's gotten and how out-of-touch he is with the very idea of filmmaking.

How could this maverick who started up Sundance - and provided a dynamic forum for innovate young filmmakers on the leading edge of the cinema - end up so bogged down in his own indulgent excesses?

Granted - some of the military scenes in the third sub-plot are brimming with action and backed up with good acting, intense combat, and horrific special effects.

So, the trip to the theatre is not all lost.

Yeah, just settle back for the pyrotechnics and forget about the - er - message!

In these sequences, there is perverse entertainment value, if you like war movies.

Also, one scene in which Streep's character and her boss have it out - is a stand-out - theatrically-speaking.

Forget about the unreal dialogue their spouting, though; just focus on the amazing characterizations both are crafting before your eyes with professional ease.

There's something to marvel at.

Then - poof - the film abruptly ends without a solution!

Does Redford think it's a job well done?

In sum, I'd surmise he's under the mistaken impression that he's spun out some thought-provoking ideas, put out an ominous spin on the Iraq War worth fathoming - and in the process - effectively tossed into filmgoers' laps puzzle pieces to solidly snap together.

Got the message?

The promos say "Lions for Lambs" is a wake up call for America.

The audience needed one, they were falling asleep in the theatre.

"Lions for Lambs" didn't go out with a roar, it departed with a whimper!

Monday, September 3, 2007

Bill Clinton...Viagra ad?


In the future I may be a little more cautious when I bend over and snatch up the Sunday paper...why?

Recently, the LA TIMES featured a handful of snapshots of politicians in various clinches - lip-locks with the Gores, the Giulianis - and yes - the Clintons.

Heh, I nearly lost my breakfast!

The caption read, "...in '08 a little leg may go a long way".

If sex sells, the probing Journalist theorizes, aspiring couples in the Presidential race - knowingly or not - may bring the issue to the fore.

The thrust of the article is whether "public displays of affection" (or PDA's,the code word we used as kids to signal a date to get the paws off) are an asset to a campaign or not.

One expert opines, "Politicians often say that a candidate's spouse is a negligible factor when it comes to choosing a candidate".

"A candidate's spouse has to be a possible enhancement, if not - at least cause no harm."

Well, in the instance of John Kerry, it may have been true.

How many voters were comfortable with the idea of the ketchup bottle heiress roaming the hallowed halls of the White House swilling an expensive glass of wine in hand?

If the photos are any indication, it is evident that calculated press ops should be kept at bay.

The Al & Tipper smooch is not only reminiscent of the forced one Michael Jackson planted on Lisa Marie's pert lips, but also the dry, uncomfortable peck Cruise tried to launch on Katie Holmes (Mission: Impossible).

The Giuliani still appeared staged and phony in one sense.

The Body Language - especially the prominent hand grips by both partners - on arm, shoulder, and face (!) - suggested that His Honor was holding on for dear life - lest the trophy wife take flight; while his other half may have been clutching just as fiercely for fear he'd catch the eye of a seductress seeking to be number four wife.

Notwithstanding, the impression elucidated subliminally, is that of sublime bondage, perhaps.

The shot of the Clintons takes the prize, though.

The whole attitude of the photograph - their stance - and especially her bare legs and his noticeable lack of muscle tone (the line in the song goes something like this: with a figure less than Greek...) offers up something entirely unique.

The image reminds me of two has-been celebrities trotted out on "Dancing with the Stars" - workin' out their moves - and praying for a second chance at the brass ring.

It'd make a good ad for Viagra or a time-share, without doubt.

One has to wonder, does Hillary still hanker for nookie with Bill?

Gee, if we don't ask, maybe they won't tell.
 
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